So you want to go back to Egypt? A question that I had to ask myself a little while ago. Not the Egypt that we know in the news today, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MD9W61KZYxk but rather this is the name of a song he sang. In this case Egypt was a metaphor for slavery, he was talking about how the Iraesalites after they had escaped from slavery in Egypt were complaining that they were better off back in Egypt under slavery. Well in my situation I had realised that I had gained weight again, I was going back to Egypt being enslaved by old habits and attitudes. I was assuaging my feelings of loneliness, stress and isolation with food. After all the distance I had come I was going back there. I knew I had to do something but it was just in the too hard basket.
A new job had meant that I was extra busy and my personal living circumstances meant that it is was impossible to get to the gym. Couple this with a recurrence of an old back injury and my ongoing narratives around relationships I was sinking in a morass of self pity and excuses. I had stopped weighing myself and had to buy new trousers. I had gained 15 kilos. Now at 108 kgs I still was 30 kgs lighter and a lot of people didn’t notice but I did. It was the usual suspects, snacks that were my undoing, I love chocolate and boy does it make me feel good. Reality check time for me. The opportunity came in weight loss warriors a competition at school. So tick 1 accountability. Truth telling. Weigh ins and reality.
Tick two, stop forcing the issue around relationships. I have given up internet dating. I don’t have the time , inclination or emotional strength to go through that right now, but more of that in my next blog. Tick three, my ex employer talks often about don’t focus on what you can’t do, focus on what you can do and for me I can walk, yes at 8.30 (or later) it is cold, sometimes wet and unpleasant but no compromise, three times a week minimum 30 minutes plus of walking at a brisk pace. Why because I don’t want to be a fat useless piece of junk again. More on that later.
Well the outcome of all that is that I am averaging a kilo a week weight loss, I am still sore, lonely and isolated and on occasion stressed, but I always feel better after a walk and I can fit my skinny jeans again. I am on track and when I get the chance to turn up the heat on my exercise I will see even better results. Big goals to reach I certainly have but above all else I have something that will get me there. I have a plan and an attitude, no compromise and no excuses.